The Mom, Wife, Dream Life

Habits are a funny thing. One day, you start doing something, usually because you want to, and then (on average) about 66 days later, you no longer have to think about doing that thing; it’s naturally part of your daily routine. I have had many habits in my lifetime thus far, some I’ve stopped doing, while others I have added to. For example, I have stopped checking under my bed and in my closet at night before I go to bed. I started doing this, I think, earlier on in High School. I had watched a scary movie one night, and had to make sure there was nothing and nobody in my closet or under my bed. Then it became a habit, and it had to be part of my getting-ready-for-bed ritual or routine to go to bed. Now, instead of checking under the bed, I check the locks on the doors and make sure the lights are turned off. I still have a similar habit, but not for the same reasons as I did before. 

I don’t know if this is just me, or if other people do this too, but when I have a routine or habit, I have to do it the same way every time or, it throws me off. Maybe that’s where some OCD comes in, or maybe I just like consistency. 

What Habits Do I Have As a Busy Mom?

Other habits in my life continue to shape me as a Mom, Wife, and individual. When I wake up in the mornings, I’ve started taking better care of myself both physically and mentally. I get up, shower, wash my face, brush my teeth, get dressed, do my hair, etc. I used to sleep in until it was time to get my daughters up for the day, and when that would happen, I usually had little motivation to get anything done around the house. Now that I’ve started waking up a little before getting them up, I have more energy, more motivation, and a better desire to take care of my body. After having baby U., it was hard for me to want to take care of myself. As I’m getting passed those thoughts and feelings, and being able to rely more on Ethan, I am getting that desire back, and boy does it feel good! 

Do I still struggle with wanting to take a shower every so often? You bet I do, but sometimes pushing myself to do even those simple routines makes all the difference in my attitude. I am a better Mom because I take care of myself and therefore have the care to do the same for my girls. I am a better Wife, because I notice the improvements in our marriage when I am feeling healthy, clean, and well-groomed. 

How Do I Find Success in My Habits? 

Another small habit that I have started recently is writing blogs. Sticking to my goals and being able to work alongside my husband has been incredibly rewarding. For those of you who don’t know, Ethan is my SEO Manager for my website and all my posts and blogs. He takes care of the statistics, analyzing the data, backlinking, editing, and so much more. I couldn’t produce the work I do without his help. I can achieve my desire to write blogs because he has supported me and encouraged me to seek those opportunities in life. He is my biggest supporter and my number one reader. I now write every day in preparation for the upcoming blogs and posts. We plan together, and we talk together frequently about content. This is becoming a habit, and it’s made me a better Mom and Wife because it’s important to follow your dreams and accomplish your goals. I am determined to do so, and having that expectation for myself allows me to encourage Ethan and our girls to do the same. 

How Can Habits Be Beneficial as I Build My Dream Life?

Daily habits can be anything from brushing your teeth to mowing the lawn. Whatever habits you have, you can find ways to make them beneficial to your growth as an individual, a mom, a wife, a husband, a father, a teacher, a manager, etc. There are so many things that we do in our daily lives that truly affect the person we are outside of ourselves. Do you have habits that keep your body healthy and strong? Do you have habits that deter you from doing and achieving your basic needs? If your habits are unhealthy, what can you do today to change them into habits that will benefit your life rather than prohibit it? 

Habits help define who we are, they help shape our priorities, determine our values, and ultimately create our character or personality. Not only that, but habits that our partners have, our friends have, our parents have, and even habits that our children have can influence each of us. One habit that our oldest, E, has had since she started making noises has been talking to herself before she falls asleep. One thing I have noticed is that she will say things she’s heard throughout the day, or she will sing songs that we sang the same day. 

Sometimes she will even bring up random facts, people, names, and activities that we’ve done in the past and talk to herself about them. We have a baby monitor that monitors both our girls, and being able to hear and see E talk to herself before she falls asleep is precious. It reminds us that she is extremely observant, as most little kids are, but so much so that even when I don’t think she is paying attention during the day, she will repeat what I said or did at night.

 For example, she had tripped and fallen in the house one time and bonked her head, so I held her and gave her “loves” (loves are what we call hugs/kisses in our home) to help her feel better. I would ask her if she was okay and what had happened. Later that night, when E was going to bed, I heard a loud thud/bonk noise over the monitor. I looked at the screen, and E asked her baby doll if she was okay, and proceeded to hold her doll, and gave her love.” Her baby doll had hit the wall, and so E took it upon herself to offer love and affection when her doll was hurting and in pain. This is a great habit to form in kids and adults if they don’t already possess this habit.

How Can I Build a Habit of Loving and Helping Others?

The habit is to choose love when someone gets hurt, to choose to say sorry if we have done wrong, and to offer support when it is needed. These things should always be given, even if they’re not necessarily wanted. Love is deserving of and for everyone, regardless of what they have done to you, and/or to someone you know. You do not have to love what the person has done, but you can choose to simply love them as a person. If you are religious, try seeing them as a Son or Daughter of God, and love them like a brother or sister. This helps me to love over hate, and forgive over holding a grudge. It’s not easy, but loving can become a habit if we want it to. It can take weeks, months, and sometimes even years to fully create the habit of love. I promise you can make it a daily habit in your life that can change your life indefinitely. By instilling that habit into our children at a young age will help them to maintain the habit as they grow up. 

Can Reading Help Build Your Dream Life?

One small habit that I do that I believe helps me in changing and redesigning my life as a mom and wife is listening to books. I have always enjoyed reading, and listening to books has been my recent go-to when doing chores, getting the house picked up, getting ready for the day, etc. It’s easy to put on a book and multitask. Don’t get me wrong, I love reading actual paper books, but as a mom and wife trying to keep up with the daily responsibilities, sometimes an audiobook is as good as I am going to get for a while. 

Not only am I completing my goal of wanting to read at least 36 books within the year (I add more to my list each year), but I am also learning new lessons, expanding my knowledge, and letting my imagination flow. This habit of mine has increased my desire to learn more than I already know and to find deeper purpose within myself. If you need any book recommendations, want a friend to encourage you to read more, or simply just want to know what I’m reading, go check out my Goodreads account!

Small daily habits are changing my life as a mom and wife for the better. Learning to accept the changes and roll with the good that they bring encourages me to be a better person. What are you doing that helps make you a mom, wife, or dreamer? I would love to hear about these steps you are taking!

“By developing and practicing good habits each day, you affirm that you do have control over the very core of your life amid the chaos.”

McKenna Sanders

The Mom, Wife, Dream Life Blog

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